I was, in a word, thrilled when I received an email from my favorite BDSM author, Eden Bradley, inviting me to participate in this event. Just looking at the names on this list… I am truly in exceptional company.

We all feel different about BDSM, what it means, what it signifies. It’s individual in how it plays out in someone’s life and what it is to me will be something else to another. We all have different levels of experience. Some of us may not have any experience at all beyond in depth research. But I think we all have a respect for the lifestyle that comes through in our writing.

My own exploration into BDSM has taught me respect for different opinions, different feelings, different avenues, different sexualities. Pain has taught me focus and to breathe. Bondage has taught me release of control in a way that nothing else ever good and to just accept. Spankings, floggings these things have taught me the benefits of tears, of emotional release of pent up stress. Discipline has taught me…discipline, to do as I should which isn’t always what I want or what is expected, it has taught me to think before I act, to think over what has already been done, to focus me on what is ahead. Punishment has taught me respect of authority, how to face my mistakes and missteps. I have been taught humility, and to accept myself.

BDSM has opened my eyes in a way nothing else I’ve ever encountered has. I am profoundly grateful I happened up on the lifestyle years ago. And yes, the sexual benefits are…incredible. But it’s not all or even mostly about sex. Not for me at least. There’s more, much more below the surface.

The media, in television and movies, has promoted BDSM to be deviant, to be maybe not wrong, but not exactly right or acceptable, that there’s always something that could have been ‘fixed’ about the person or changed about them so they didn’t want or need these things any longer. It’s a shame the lifestyle is viewed this way, is broadcast this way. But, it’s easy to cast a shadow over things that aren’t understood…

I hope you’ll come visit on Wednesday and Thursday over at the Smutketeers blog. There are giveaways, as well as questions and answers.

If you have a chance before then, check out some of the authors listed. You might have read them all or there maybe some new to you ones…

~lissa

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