Are you there, readers? It’s me, Lissa. I know some of you are still there because you email me, check in with me, check in on me. Some of you (though I’m not naming names, Lynda) have even threatened to join my Ellora’s Cave editor in kicking my ass if I didn’t get a move on. Y’all should know me well enough by now to know how much I love toughness, roughness, and thinly veiled threats used as motivational tools.
I love y’all. I do. You guys mean the world to me and your unwavering support is truly amazing. There are things about this business that I could have never dreamed possible for myself and the readers that have found my books and really love them are amongst those things…
I am reading a book at the moment, actually, I am reading half a dozen books at the moment, but one of them is titled Bullies, Bastards, and Bitches. It is a non-fiction craft book about the creating of bad guys and gals in fiction. This book has spoken to me and so far I’m only just beyond the preface. It’s the preface though that caught and held me.
The author pinpointed exactly how I have been feeling since early December. “…anemic and wrung dry. …began reading to replenish the words, concepts, and images I needed to write… …a sort of triage for the writer’s soul… The ragged edges of my brain started mending and were replaced by… characters, plots, scenes… And I fell back in love with this part of my life.” (Jessica Page Morrell, Bullies Bastards and Bitches, page 1)
She goes on to talk about vulnerability and how the different things that happen in our lives create this vulnerability, this hurt, this pain, this rock bottom feeling that takes time to heal, that takes time to learn from, that takes time to grow from and to find ourselves again from… And let me tell you, vulnerability sucks, especially when you have no control over how or when or why or what. Words you wish you could forget, deeds you wish could be undone… But, it’s like Spring, as cliche as that sounds. Coming out from the darkness and the cold into the light and warm sunshine, a blooming takes effect. You’ve learned something, you’ve grown, you’ve seen and overcome. You can move on and move forward, embrace the next phase of things… That’s me in a nutshell at this point.
My reader, Lynda, commented in an email the other day that not counting Ink Spots, it’s been way too long since I’ve had a new release. Now, I’m not sure why she’s not counting Ink Spots, but… It’s going to be a few months before there’s a release. You see, one has to have a book finished to turn in and I don’t have that. It was remarked upon that Forever In Blue Jeans was nearly complete according to the sidebar over there, and in some ways it is and in some ways it isn’t. I have roughly 35000 words on it. But not a lick of it makes any sense. It’s been started, restarted, and restarted again. It’s had plot changes galore. So, it’s being re-worked. Again. This time with it’s author, ME, having a clearer less stressed head on her shoulders.
I have also found the hero, Cort…
Or rather, the inspiration for him, something I didn’t have a clear idea on before.
The time away from writing allowed me to not only read more, but also to embrace once again other things I’d missed. Laughing. Playing games with my kids. Cooking. Crocheting. Organizing. Being creative in ways that had nothing to do with writing, but that helped to feed my soul so that one day I could return to writing.
I have undertaken the task of re-organizing and decluttering my house. I’ve enlisted the help of my daughter to paint and add color. I’ve created a new blog with the intention to document and find some accountability to do these projects, to keep my focus in different areas at different times so that I don’t burn out and let the negative get to me so much that I hit rock bottom again with my writing.
The biggest thing so far that I’ve done is created space in my house for me. We’ve transformed the ‘family room’ into a home office/craft space for me. In all the years that I’ve worked from home, which is 11 years, I’ve never had ‘space’ of my own. I’ve always had to make due and while this is still me making due, I’ve put my own personal touches on it, added in things I love, and it’s right here at the kitchen, too, so… I can cook and bake as well. I don’t look on these as chores 99% of the time, so it works. I’ll be documenting this transformation on my new blog as well. I’ll also be talking about it on Eileen Andrews blog this year.
The family room turned office/craft area/business center/home school paperwork place has started the decluttering and organization process as well. I love this kind of stuff. I mean, I truly love it. It gives me energy in a way that a walk around the block never has, though that has it’s place as well. I read books on decluttering and magazine articles, and it’s inspiring, mood lifting, stress relieving. These are all things that I need.
Are y’all bored yet? Grins…
I just wanted to touch base, to let you all know I’m still here, even more here than I’ve been in the last almost two months. And to those of you who have asked, and hoped that I would started writing again, thank you. I have.
Oh and for those of you that weren’t with me last year in February, I had a birthday party on my blog where I invited authors to come on and share excerpts and giveaways. I am doing something similar this year, only the ‘presents’ that I’m giving away have grown a little larger. I will be giving you details in the next couple of days as I wrap up the guest list of authors and bloggers that will be participating. It’s going to be a lot of fun.