Crawling back. Well, my heroines don’t usually crawl back. My heros don’t crawl back either, per se. They do, however, go after the women they want.
Occasionally though, I’ll shift from this and the need of a heroine is so great, so overwhelming that she can’t help herself, can’t deny herself, can’t live without trying one more time to make him see…
Life as she’d known it was gone and even though it had been two years, until she’d seen Jethro last week, fucked him on the front porch swing, she’d been walking around in a fog.
She hadn’t gone out there for sex but he’d looked so good, so hot. He was her wet dream, her every naughty thought. He’d let his hair grow out, gotten a few tats and hadn’t shaved when she saw him. When he said climb on, she’d been helpless against him, against the hunger that gnawed at her, clawed at her. Wanting him consumed her and her cool, calm persona had come crumbling down while he was buried so deep inside her.
Without thinking about it, she picked up her phone and dialed his number. On the fifth ring she started to hang up, but…
“You keep calling. I can only resist for so long.”
“I… I want to see you.”
“We talked about this.”
“I don’t care anymore, Jethro. I need you and you need me. You love me, dammit.” And he did. She knew it, always knew it. Even with the double-digit miles between them from county line to big city lights, she knew it, could feel it.
“Doesn’t change anything.”
She flopped back on the couch. “It changes everything.”
“We can try.”
“You feel guilty about loving me, Caitlyn. We can’t try when you feel bad about it.”
“I know, but I can’t stay away from you anymore either. Please, Jethro.”
She hated that she was on the verge of tears again. She couldn’t handle rejection from him. Not now. Not when she’d really listened and thought about Margaret’s arguments. Marg hadn’t said anything Caitlyn didn’t already know, but having it spoken out loud was always like a bucket of ice water being thrown.
“I don’t want only part of you. I won’t be second best again. I did it for Marc because he was my brother and he loved you. I won’t do it for anyone or any other reason ever again. Even him.”
“Have you been dreaming again?”
She was shocked. “Yes. How do you know?”
“The nights I stayed with you after I got out of the hospital for the infection. You were dreaming, moaning, calling out my name. It took me a few times to realize you were dreaming, not actually calling me.”
“Oh.” She was so embarrassed. Even though he couldn’t see her at that moment, she turned her head toward the back cushions and buried her face.
“Come to me, Caitlyn. But make damn sure this is what you want. I won’t let you walk away again. I won’t let you rip my heart out and stomp it all to hell. I love you, but I won’t let you break me for a third time.”
And she knew she had. She deserved the warnings and she would do well to heed them. If she went to him, she had to be prepared to stay. It wouldn’t be fair to either of them otherwise. “I understand.”
“Then I’ll be waiting.”
Take a moment to visit the following blogs, but if you live where it’s sunny out and gorgeous, get outside afterward… We’ve all stayed inside way too long…